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Thread: 19:Are You a Swinger?
 

 Aug 01, 2009 10:45:02 PM
Swingerology
Posts: 592
Responses: 988
Location: PHOENIX,AZ
Level: Admins
19:Are You a Swinger?

You can answer this question, with a "YES" otherwise you wouldnít be here, or you are on your way to becoming a swinger. Now when I go to a swinger event I assume that everyone there is a swinger. I'm in my environment, with open minded people, and I can just be myself. However, when I go out in the real world I have to adapt to that environment and not just be. But, every now and again I run into an individual or individuals that make me start asking the question, "Are you a swinger". Of course I ask this question in my head, because I don't want to freak anyone out, but I'm curious to know because they're giving off vibes similar to what I would expect in a swinger atmosphere. Now Iím contemplating, should I put myself out there and simply state, yeah Iím a swinger, are you? This comes in to play mostly when the person is hot and Iím attracted to them, but don't want to cross the lines, since Iím not in my environment. So what should I do? It would be nice if swingers had a code they can just throw out there to see who is in the lifestyle. I read once, some people use a phrase "do you know George?" but everyone in the lifestyle doesnít know George :) so it's not a fool proof way to know. So how do we know?

I met a woman the other day that I was sure was implying she wanted to fill in for me, with my wife. But this was such a vanilla area and the person she's with is definitely vanilla, so how should I react. ďYeah baby, join us when you can" It threw me back so much, it made me feel vanilla. I just wanted to put it out there, and find out how others have handled similar situations.

What do we do when we encounter others that seem like they are swingers? Shy a way and smile, or simply ask "Are you a swinger?"

Roy


 Aug 12, 2009 02:37:30 PM
Emilybronte
Posts: 592
Responses: 988
Location: MESA,AZ

I think this is a valid question. I have heard this posed around the community, tho have a pin or something that everyone could wear that indicates their preference. I usually NEVER do anything naughty like this outside of parties, but I have started chatting a lot more and it is easier just to ask people if they are 'KINKY' at first. Once you break the ice with that question, swinging is NOT the worst thing they can answer too!! Many couples I have talked to are shocked and want to know more and where and how ... LOL

 Aug 18, 2009 07:26:01 AM
Swingerology
Posts: 592
Responses: 988
Location: PHOENIX,AZ
Level: Admins

"

Originally Posted by: Emilybronte

I think this is a valid question. I have heard this posed around the community, tho have a pin or something that everyone could wear that indicates their preference. I usually NEVER do anything naughty like this outside of parties, but I have started chatting a lot more and it is easier just to ask people if they are 'KINKY' at first. Once you break the ice with that question, swinging is NOT the worst thing they can answer too!! Many couples I have talked to are shocked and want to know more and where and how ... LOL

"


I've posted this blog on myspace, facebook and other places and everyone seem to indicated, either the pin is a good idea or it's being done. The question is, will that stick as a form of identification, since some people who play hard don't want to be identified. I personally think it's a good idea, especially if you think you're going to an event that might include from opeminded people that might be interested in meeting other openminded people.

I guess just asking is not bad idea too, but it can't be out of the blue more like if the conversation is already getting open, then a suggestion could be swiftly be stuck in. But it still seems hard, if you don't want to risk it.

 Sep 01, 2009 09:29:10 PM
Supercrazybitch
Posts: 592
Responses: 988
Location: Tallahassee,FL

I've never had that kind of encounter as a couple. And I must say if I did, I really wouldn't know how to come across.

My situation as of the last year and half is finding those to date that are into swinging but want a relationship (not just a fuck buddy to go to the clubs with).

On my dating site profiles I always put "must be open minded". And I also write that I am very diversified in my activities. I can usually tell right away after meeting them if they would be open to the idea. If not, I find ways to get answers if the dating thing is working in a vanilla way. Like going to the porn store with him is a good way to point out video's with group sex to see if he is keen to the idea.

I'm typically "found out" by a vanilla friend coming across a profile on swing site or a site like this. If they're here too then they weren't very vanilla after all either.

I suppose some sort of button could be an universal code. Like those rainbow ones are used to identify the LGBT community. However I have no idea if swingers even have a flag or set of colors??

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