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Thread: 23:Make sure you have fun everytime

 Jan 10, 2010 11:05:17 PM
Posts: 592
Responses: 988
Location: PHOENIX,AZ
Level: Admins
23:Make sure you have fun everytime

Many people, both in and out of the lifestyle, are under the misconception that swinging is all about sex. Yes sex does play a big role in swinging and if you are in the lifestyle, you will undoubtedly see a lot of people having sex, and probably be involved in many of your own encounters. Although the idea of having an open relationship is a primary attraction to people to get into the lifestyle, once youíve been around the block a few times, you may find yourself bored if this is your only focus.

When I read profiles on sites such as, I repeatedly see the desire for ďfriends firstĒ listed under ďwhat are you looking forĒ. I personally enjoy the company of open minded people more than I the focus on conquering new territory. People that are dead set on having sex at every event they attend are bound be eventually get disappointed because even if they have no standards, others do, and may not be interested. Just because an individual or a couple carries on a conversation with others for more than 5 minutes does not mean the want to have sex. I once got caught up in a conversation with a couple for almost an hour and when I finally left, they acted pissed cause I didnít drop my pants and beg them to have their way with me. We didnít play around or even flirt during the conversation, but they still had negative attitudes when I left, which made me avoid them the rest of the night and dodge them the next time I saw then at a party.

The goal in attending lifestyle events should be to have fun, which doesnít always have to end in a sexual escapade. When I attend swinger events, I now try to keep conversations short and socialize with many different groups and if I decide to play then I consider that a bonus. Iím not saying its wrong for anyone that likes to play often, but donít be mad if you donít get an opportunity to get busy. Thereís more than one day to have fun in a room full of open minded people so enjoy yourselves and donít let petty stuff get you down.

by Von

 Jan 24, 2010 01:19:01 PM
Posts: 592
Responses: 988

Love your post here! It seems to me these days folks that declare themselves swingers have not actually discussed what it entails. Because of the internet one finds many couples, but so many turn out to be the hubby posting intimate pics of his lady looking for a female to have sex with.

I remember in my younger days many fun barbecues, camping outings, all night parties where conversation, dancing, and hanging out with folks was usually the setting. If people hit it off there was the added pleasure of hooking up, or just sit around talking about adventures and other fun topics.
Technology is great, but sometimes it seems to take the fun out of getting to know others.

I agree with your first paragraph above, swinging does involve sex, but it should involve comradeship and having friends that one can go on outings with others, not necessarily to jump in bed at first chance.
Thanks for sharing your post.

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